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Let’s get real about email spam filters
Listen, shooting an email into someone’s inbox isn’t as easy as just hitting “send” and hoping for the best. Nah, there’s this never-ending battle with spam filters, and it’s, honestly, kind of wild. If you’re legit and just want your marketing pitch or newsletter to actually get seen—like, by actual people, not discarded straight into the abyss called the spam folder—then buckle up. I’m about to break down the basics with a few tricks I’ve picked up, minus all that sketchy hacker nonsense.
Quick heads-up—yeah, I’m not teaching you how to be a spammy jerk or pull off some phishing scheme. Don’t even think about it. This is all about playing fair, keeping things ethical, and not doing anything your grandma would side-eye. What you do with this info? That’s all you, man. Be cool.
What do spam filters even do, anyway?
Think of spam filters as the super-picky bouncers at the world’s most overcrowded club (aka your inbox). Their whole job is to keep out the riffraff—and, unfortunately, sometimes your totally innocent “monthly updates” too. If you know what they’re looking for, you can keep your messages on the VIP list instead of getting shown the door.
Trick #1: Use SMTP services that don’t suck
Look, you’re not gonna outsmart Gmail by just blasting a thousand emails from your Yahoo account. If you’re sending anything en masse, fork out for something proper like Amazon SES, SendGrid, or Microsoft 365. These guys have already done the legwork—inbox-friendly, pretty much by design. Oh, and set things up right. If your emails look sketchy or you keep getting bounced, your sender reputation tanks. That’s the digital version of getting blacklisted from every club in town.
Trick #2: Quit writing like a low-budget scammer
Spam filters have an allergy to cringe. If your message screams “Click now for FREE MONEY!”, that’s a one-way ticket to the spam dungeon. So, let’s keep it chill:
- Ditch words like “urgent,” “verify your account,” whatever else sounds like it belongs in an infomercial at 2AM.
- Tone down the glitter. No wild fonts, no rainbow-colored HTML, no 1998 web-design vibes.
- Double-check your messages with a spam tester (hey, MailTester is out there—use it). Don’t trust your gut on this one.
Trick #3: Lock down your links (seriously, HTTPS or bust)
Email full of links? Yeah, better make them HTTPS. Nobody—and I mean nobody—trusts HTTP anymore. In fact, most gateways just assume you’re trouble if you don’t slap an SSL on your stuff. It’s easy, just snag a certificate from Let’s Encrypt or Cloudflare. Takes five minutes, max.
Trick #4: Write emails like an actual human
Seems obvious, but apparently not. A few tips:
- Talk to your people like, you know, people. Drop in their name, reference their last order, whatever. Nobody’s impressed by “Dear valued customer.”
- Don’t try to trick anyone with clickbait-y subjects. Play it straight.
- Kick out the dead weight. If your list is full of bounces and ghosts, you look bad to the email gods. Clean it up—a lot.
Do all this, and I’m not saying you’ll never see the inside of a spam folder again (because, come on, even the best get flagged sometimes), but you’ll massively up your chances of actually getting read. Just keep it honest. Nobody likes spam, and messing with people’s inboxes? Honestly, that’s just bad karma.
Listen, shooting an email into someone’s inbox isn’t as easy as just hitting “send” and hoping for the best. Nah, there’s this never-ending battle with spam filters, and it’s, honestly, kind of wild. If you’re legit and just want your marketing pitch or newsletter to actually get seen—like, by actual people, not discarded straight into the abyss called the spam folder—then buckle up. I’m about to break down the basics with a few tricks I’ve picked up, minus all that sketchy hacker nonsense.
Quick heads-up—yeah, I’m not teaching you how to be a spammy jerk or pull off some phishing scheme. Don’t even think about it. This is all about playing fair, keeping things ethical, and not doing anything your grandma would side-eye. What you do with this info? That’s all you, man. Be cool.
What do spam filters even do, anyway?
Think of spam filters as the super-picky bouncers at the world’s most overcrowded club (aka your inbox). Their whole job is to keep out the riffraff—and, unfortunately, sometimes your totally innocent “monthly updates” too. If you know what they’re looking for, you can keep your messages on the VIP list instead of getting shown the door.
Trick #1: Use SMTP services that don’t suck
Look, you’re not gonna outsmart Gmail by just blasting a thousand emails from your Yahoo account. If you’re sending anything en masse, fork out for something proper like Amazon SES, SendGrid, or Microsoft 365. These guys have already done the legwork—inbox-friendly, pretty much by design. Oh, and set things up right. If your emails look sketchy or you keep getting bounced, your sender reputation tanks. That’s the digital version of getting blacklisted from every club in town.
Trick #2: Quit writing like a low-budget scammer
Spam filters have an allergy to cringe. If your message screams “Click now for FREE MONEY!”, that’s a one-way ticket to the spam dungeon. So, let’s keep it chill:
- Ditch words like “urgent,” “verify your account,” whatever else sounds like it belongs in an infomercial at 2AM.
- Tone down the glitter. No wild fonts, no rainbow-colored HTML, no 1998 web-design vibes.
- Double-check your messages with a spam tester (hey, MailTester is out there—use it). Don’t trust your gut on this one.
Trick #3: Lock down your links (seriously, HTTPS or bust)
Email full of links? Yeah, better make them HTTPS. Nobody—and I mean nobody—trusts HTTP anymore. In fact, most gateways just assume you’re trouble if you don’t slap an SSL on your stuff. It’s easy, just snag a certificate from Let’s Encrypt or Cloudflare. Takes five minutes, max.
Trick #4: Write emails like an actual human
Seems obvious, but apparently not. A few tips:
- Talk to your people like, you know, people. Drop in their name, reference their last order, whatever. Nobody’s impressed by “Dear valued customer.”
- Don’t try to trick anyone with clickbait-y subjects. Play it straight.
- Kick out the dead weight. If your list is full of bounces and ghosts, you look bad to the email gods. Clean it up—a lot.
Do all this, and I’m not saying you’ll never see the inside of a spam folder again (because, come on, even the best get flagged sometimes), but you’ll massively up your chances of actually getting read. Just keep it honest. Nobody likes spam, and messing with people’s inboxes? Honestly, that’s just bad karma.
